I've been talking to a friend of mine about the struggles of dating as parents. My friend, a guy, is an amazing father. Great with his kid and a father that goes the extra mile in the dad department. His current relationship I believe is suffering just because he's so awesome.
For starters it's so great to have a dad be in the same boat as most women. Us ladies have to deal with the fact that we put our kids before dating. We don't have time and we want the guy we date to love our child as he would love his own or as he loves us. To see that men face these same issues makes me feel like it can't be a woman's issue exclusively. And to go beyond that it can't just be a parents issue only either.
I know a ton of chicks that are in and out of relationships all over my Instagram page and are parents. They will take pics one month with one guy and two months later there is another guy. Guys with kids will date a chick and wife her, let her meet the kids and in 6 months all the evidence of the short fling is erased from all social media. So clearly dating isn't an issue for ALL parents. It's just an issue for the parents who aren't introducing our kids to everyone or who aren't leaving our kids home every night to hang/party/date.
My friend asked me what he should do when the girl he loves can't get with the fact that his kid comes first. And my honest opinion was for him to "Fade to Black". Stop calling her. Don't speak, cut her out your life. But then I started thinking. Why do all the extraordinary parents always get the short end of the stick? The moms who leave their kids with friends to go find a man every weekend will return back home with 30 new numbers. End up with three dates the following week, and then end up in social media relationships. But the mothers like me. Who never go out, spends all their free time with their child, and prefers a me day over a night at the club, can never find a perfect match. (Not that I haven't 💁💁). Lol!
It's sorta backwards. It's almost like the dating world looks at us and goes "nope they are too serious about their child. Let me stay away from that". It's like we are intimadating or something. Maybe the opposite sex thinks it's hard to compete with our child. Or maybe they think "I've never seen such a dedicated parent before".
I look at it like this (on behalf of my friend anyway) :
If a man, will take care of his children and do it beyond the normal standards, he will definintly take care of the woman that he chooses too. An exceptional father is hard to come by. Most single fathers are weekend dads. They are usually just bread winners for their children. But when you have a father who gets his child week on and week off, provides, educates, is fully involved, and carries as much a role as the mother....the opposite sex is scared. The only woman that would be right for this guy is a woman that is an exceptional mother or either wants to be one day.
It's just such a bummer that us extordinary parents find partners that feel threatened by how serious we take raising our children. They say nice guys finish last...well I guess it's the same for super dads too.